Funk solved!

No weigh in today. It was shockingly high this morning, which I attribute to the wine I had Friday, Saturday and Sunday this weekend, (busy social girl!) and the fact that I am at the peak of my cycle. Which, by the way, I "became a woman" over TWENTY years ago - you'd think I'd be able to tell when I am having a hormonal mood swing by now, for crying out loud. This was a long one, which I think is why it didn't occur to me. It is amazing how powerful my emotional swings are. But again, eating well and exercising have eliminated my cramps for two months in a row - that is a serious first for me.

So if we don't post weight, here are my NSV's for the week!

• I exercised 5 days in a row - hooray!
• I listened to my body and waited for it to get hungry (and apparently thirsty, with all that wine, eh?)

My challenge this week - a weekend with old friends at a wedding reception, which will have lots of food and drink. Another complication, it is in my old college town, so I'm already having memories of my favorite eateries. Being nostalgic about food is a serious pitfall of mine. The other problem? The reception is a luncheon, (at which I'm singing - those poor guests who have to listen to me!) so we arrive at 11, disperse at 2:30 and then are to meet up again for a dinner later that evening. However, with that schedule, exercise is most likely not in the cards for me. I know, I know, I have at least a few hours before dinner, but that's going to be spent visiting. So I'll have to make good choices, yes? Yes. Always facing choices. I hate that feeling when my time is taken away from me, and I end up having to ask myself over and over again - do you want to eat that, or do you want to weigh less? I want both, dammit! Must remember to have a lot of vegetables, and not as much wine. I'm writing that on my hand, I think.

The F Word

I am in a funk. There's just a general malaise - I guess I could call it depression, but it doesn't quite feel like that heavy. It is more like a general dissatisfaction with my life. I know I should be grateful for all I have, and that there are people in the world without caring families, friends, food and shelter and disease-free bodies. But sometimes a girl just gets down. I haven't wanted to focus on weight loss, I haven't wanted to cook anything spectacular, or socialize very much - which is very strange for me. I think I'm coming down from the high of having my husband return and the reunited bliss that ensued (lots of eating and snuggling) and then reality comes back in the form of trying to get into a new routine. I learned while my hubby was gone for 3 weeks that a) I really enjoy taking care of him, and b) that I want to spend more time at home with him and c) We watch too much TV. But I also want to exercise, and get out of the ding dang 220s already! (222.2 this morning, for reporting sake). But the effort to make both of these happen is not coming easily to me.

I have avoided posting anything here - and I am hesitant to publish this. It's not effective, interesting or insightful. It is just where I'm at. Here are some positives:

• I have exercised two days in a row, and will again tonight
• I have made a nutritious lunch and dinner for myself this week
• I went shopping and got some cute new outfits
• I have a beautiful pedicure
• The sun is out!

I think I've lost my steam - it is not a struggle to do anything, but I am not excited about what I'm doing. I hope in the coming days I am able to shake myself out of these doldrums. Because really, it is ridiculous - I have so much potential.