HYC Check In

Well Tuesday morning has greeted me in a significant way. Today is literally the 2 year anniversary of my first weigh-in. July 27, 2006, I was 285.5 pounds. I had decided the week before that I would commit to putting my weight on the Internet with Mel and her Diet Naked Team. 2 years later, I'm down 62 pounds. Not where I thought I would be, of course. I thought I would be one of those gals on the cover of People magazine touting "I lost over 100 pounds with diet and exercise, look at me now!" It is obviously not the fastest weight loss on record, but I'm proud of the permanent changes I have made in my life.

Seeing this number on the scale hurt this morning. 228.2. Ouch. I was only 223.8 on Friday, so my indulgent weekend had quite an effect. Now I have 8.2 pounds worth of motivation to get back to my 70 pound mark. It is really hard to be back here, to be positive and not throw in the towel. But I am being honest here, and that's what the scale saw today, ugly as it is. Thanks for the reminder, universe, that I gain weight instantly if I go off plan. I hear you. I'm back to strict portioning!

So for this week, my meals are planned, exercise is back on the menu, and dedication is off the charts. I swear.

Starting over

Oh! Here's where I left my blog. My goodness, it has been a while. I have had the busiest summer of celebrations ever. 3 events where I was pretty integral to the planning and something had to fall by the wayside. Unfortunately, eating well fell down with blogging. I have a hard time saying no to a party. I have an even harder time saying no to wine and snacks at a party. So, I didn't say no, quite a bit. Exercise has been spotty and when I finally got on the scale, I've gained nearly 4 pounds. Yikes! But I followed the perfect combination for gaining weight, so I was not surprised.

Last week I took the whole week off from work and relaxed at home. Also I pretended I was a housewife as Mr. Black couldn't take any vacation time. It was pretty fun, although I never greeted him at the door in Saran Wrap or anything. I think I enjoyed it because it was only temporary. Best housewife score? I got organic ground beef for $1.50 a pound!! I bought 10 pounds worth. That's unheard of. (It only had 3 days before expiring, so into the freezer it went.

I exercised 5 days in a row - count 'em - 5! That felt really good. One of my most significant chores was clearing out all of the clothes that I can't wear anymore. Because they are too big. I did keep some that are marginal - like I shouldn't wear them, but I can still kinda get away with it, if I have to. It was very freeing and also it is wonderful to not have to dig my way through my closet to find things to wear. And also, now I get to shop!

Now that my summer is mine again, I am able to re-double my efforts. Time to ask the question - what is it worth? What is exercising and eating well worth to me. The effort and time and deprivation? You bet. Time to make my goals here. I'm also back to daily weighing and hope that tomorrow will be only mildly painful.

I also read blogs galore, but didn't comment anywhere. I am really looking forward to re-dedicating myself to the Healthy You Challenge and being a true participant. I'm back and better than ever!

My Mr. Black

He is my heart, my home, my SupaHunk, my Pamplemousse, my Sexy Taxi Driver and friend. This complicated man, who loves super heroes and horror stories with the same verve as he does musical theater and Shakespeare, makes sure that I have fun, he helps me relax - encouraging me to appreciate all that we are blessed with in our life, so that I can stop trying to make it bigger, better and faster. He lets me be loud and obnoxious and lets me tell my stories over and over and over again to any new audience I find, without ever saying "This one again?". When I had surgery last year, he sat by my bed watching me sleep, refusing to leave until he was sure they brought me the fizzy water I asked for. Then tenderly took care of my wounds without being grossed out, as I would have been. I am endlessly surprised with how many secret dates and surprise gifts he plans for us, how many poems and songs he makes up on the spot that can crack me up. He puts up with my bossy lady ways, my gasping in the car when he's driving, and my need to cook grand meals and destroy the kitchen once a week. This man is so wicked smart, he beats my Mom at Trivial Pursuit every time we play, which is quite a feat and hilarious - she's a sore loser and he's a gentle winner - he is logical and makes a good sounding board for working out any crazy ideas I come up with. I can ask him anything about history, ancient Gods or movies and he'll know the answer and never ever laughs at me for not knowing. It's a blessing to live with someone who will stop what he's saying or interrupt me when I'm talking to say "You're pretty." all with this voice of wonder, like he just noticed, unprompted by me. After three years of marriage, we're still learning about each other, we're learning how to live together and support each other in ways that are different from just dating, and even though there have been tears, and eye rolling and the slamming of doors, we're still laughing together, making plans together and enjoying our life together. Happy Anniversary, my sweet bebe!

Of the Salt and the Crunch

At my office, we can't open an envelope without having it catered. Box lunches litter the conference rooms each week around here. And most come with the ubiquitous bag-o-chips. I have two bags in my desk. Potato chips are my nemesis. I would like to say that this journey to smaller sizes and better health has blessed me with the ability to always breezily pass by trigger foods entirely, or have JUST a single portion. However, potato chips are the exception. I will eat them by the handful, as many as I can, and love every single crispy, greasy, and salty bite. (hi, mouth is watering, now)

So today I got the salty/crunchy snacky cravings. And I thought - the chips are there - just get them! Then I thought "Yum!" and then I thought "You should go get your cherries from the fridge instead." And then I remembered that I could have an ounce of roasted and salted almonds instead of potato chips. They "cost" about 70 calories more than the chips, but add protein, heart-healthy fat and fiber. And they also give me a salty crunch. But the bigger question is why keep the TWO! Uneaten! Bags in my desk? They've been there for weeks, people, weeks, shouldn't I just get rid of them? I think I want them for PMS emergencies. Perhaps I'll examine this further at a later date. But today, they're still there, and I ate the cherries and almonds instead. The End.

HYC Check In

Time to check in again! This week was a little wonky, eating wise. I think it started with spending the weekend at my Mom’s house and then eating out Sunday evening, then returning to my regular schedule, but without having had the time to prepare my meals for lunch as I prefer. I’m learning that I crave the security of planning my meals. Which is odd, I think, because what is the big deal of going to the salad bar at lunch time, you know? I think I like knowing exactly what I’m eating and making the right choice. Then I had an additional two nights of eating out – and I had drinks at both. At least I made my exercise schedule, well, with the exception of the racquetball debacle. I’m staying off the scale until mid-July. A couple weeks after TOM is over and done with, and then I’ll be ready. I’m digging this weigh in schedule.

In other news, I went on a shopping trip this weekend and found 2 lovely dresses – both in a size 16! This is significant, being a former 26. Hooray for summer and smaller sizes!

My goal this next week is to not over-do the eating, prep my lunches and plan my dinners, and push my physical limits at the gym. Have a great week!